
Crushed
When life does not co-operate with you
You feel lost, drowning in your own thoughts…
You want to escape you want to get out
Wave after wave knocks you down
you are barely breathing
Confusion sets in,
you try to run but you don’t get anywhere
Your mind doesn’t want to shut up
it keeps on screaming
it keeps on banging you with thoughts
Your heart wants to fade
Your heart and mind are at war
You want them to stop, but they just go on
You fear for your own life, it numbs you
The earth will swallow you alive
Keep on breathing, keep yourself together
No one sees the fight you have with yourself
Life passes you by
Lost in yourself
You pull the sword to end it all
You fall to your knees
Tears are running down your cheeks
You want it all to stop, you want out
Fear and confused, you cry out
Help me, help me!
But no help arrives
The earth is spinning
Your life flashes before your eyes
You scream, make it stop!
Pain, shame, fear, and anger tear you apart
The pain is so intense
You feel cold and confused
It doesn’t seem to stop
I am drowning, I am falling
You try to escape, but it’s not working
You give yourself over to the pain, fear, and shame
It swallows you alive
It’s tearing you apart
You fall on your face
Screaming, let me out
Why are the memories so vivid, so clear?
You can feel the hand on your body
The pain going through your mind
My heart can’t take it anymore
My heart is leaving me broken
But still, I am breathing
Bearley alive, but still fully alive
Colours are spinning,
thoughts are rushing inside of me
I am falling apart, but no one seems to notice
Smile, it will get better with time,
you will forget, it will subside
But it is hunting you like a horror movie
It’s getting worse, not better
The pain in your heart breaks you down
Your heart is bleeding
your heart is fading away
Tears are not enough to express the hurt and pain
you can’t explain what you are feeling
It’s tearing you apart
But you are still alive
You are still breathing
But at the same time,
you are drowning – dying inside
The Panic attacks
It’s tearing you apart
The fear is so intense
You can’t escape the tears
The flashbacks are killing you
The intensity of dying overpowers you
Your thoughts are overwhelming you
You can’t get out
You can’t escape
You try to hide,
but can’t get small enough to disappear
Fear is gripping your heart
The pain makes your heart, ache
Your heart seems to miss a beat
But it’s not enough to let you die
You want out
But fear keeps you there
You want to kill the thoughts,
but it is too much, alive
Speak to someone, get it out
tell someone,
dig into the fear and pain
Get so close to the pain
that you can feel it brush over you
But still, it is like,
it is swallowing you alive
There seems to be no escape
Anger is flooding your being
There appears to be no escape
You are torn apart inside
No one understands
You are in pain, and it won’t go away
Your heart wants to stop
Your mind is not obeying
Help is not on the way
Tears of fear running down your face
I’m dying, but no one is noticing
Then it’s too late, and you are gone!

Yet you keep going. In respectful awe of you. Thank you for sharing snippets of your journey.
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Pragtig. So talentvol geskryf
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Wow, very deep and emotional. That was really tough time’s
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